Yvonne was a married girlfriend that I had when I was twenty four and she was thirty seven. She was married and had two daughters. It is the only time in my life that I actually dated a married woman and is a shame that I bare to this day. I was at that time recently divorced and trying to put my life back together. Although that is no excuse for my actions, at that time there existed a confluence of circumstances that severely muddied the waters for me. I only spent about a year and a half with Yvonne but I can honestly say, I did more living in that one year than I ever have since. To be succinct, it was a world-wind romance full of everything that any tawdry romance novel could offer. It may take me a while to tell this story. In the end, I think you’ll be inclined to decide that it was worth the reading.
The year was 1990 and I had just gotten a divorce from my wife, Beverly. By the way, both of these women are now dead and no, I had nothing to do with their demises. I had moved back in with my mom and had decided to start a new career, that being locksmithing. I chose locksmithing because it was quick (only four months training) and would be fully paid for by a Native American non-profit in Oakland. My newly ex-wife Beverly was trying to give me trouble and hamper my efforts to break free, strange since she was the one who drove my away. Beverly had a daughter named Jennifer (who refuses to speak to me now). Jennifer was five years old and for all the world, thought I was her “Daddy”. Beverly was trying to use Jennifer to get me to come back which I did. Soon however, I found that it was back to the same old problems that caused me to leave and so, I left again. This time it was for good. That isn’t to say that I didn’t visit once or twice after I broke up with Yvonne though. Just once or twice, you know how it goes.
I got all the paperwork straight with the Native American group and took it down to the locksmith school for finalizing. The school was called the Golden Gate School Of Lock Technology and it was located on San Pablo Avenue in Emeryville, California. The owner of the school was Mr. Ed Scott and he also had a locksmith shop of the same name, attached right to the school next door. Neither one is in existence any longer and Ed Scott has passed on as well. The school itself was comprised of two rooms. One room was the classroom and contained thirty six desks as well as various teaching aids, the other room was a workroom where classroom theory was put into practice. The desk that I chose was near the rear of the classroom and next to the single entrance and exit. Seated in front of me was a guy named Noah Hinkston and behind me sat Yvonne, I did not know them at the time.
Noah was a very funny guy, he actually could have been a comedian. He was heavily into running track and is now actually the track coach for Oakland Technical High School. He has two daughters of his own. Well, Noah and Yvonne were constantly cutting up in class, making fun of the owner Ed Scott, who was a huge drunk, coming into class wasted and taking over. As soon as Noah and Yvonne saw Mr. Scott teeter in all liquored up, they would raise their pencils and symbolically toast each other while making a “clink” sound. I don’t know if Mr. Scott ever saw this but they made a big show of it and didn’t try to hide at all. I of course, was caught in the middle of this and had no choice but to endure. I was a serious student even if I was trapped between two who were not. At lunch time, Noah and Yvonne would jump in her Jeep and go somewhere for lunch. Eventually they got around to asking me if I wanted to come along too and I accepted. I really didn’t want to but there was nothing else to do so, why not?
If I had though that these two’s in class antics were bad, I was in for a real treat out with them in the wild. It was non-stop joking, shameless ripping on fellow classmates and the discussion of subjects that I had no knowledge of. In short, they tolerated me. I was clearly out of my league, these two were used to taking life by the horns and riding it right into the dirt. I felt really stupid around them and looking back on it now, I was. Very immature. It wasn’t until much later that I learned that they were sleeping together and deciding whether they wanted to be together or not. When Noah failed to satisfy her sexual appetites (and they were insatiable) Yvonne turned her attention to me. I’ll get back to that however, a little later on.
So everyday at lunch we would all pile into the Jeep and rip around town. I largely remained silent in the back seat while these two would just have a ball. Sometimes we would take another classmate with us but he soon bowed out for his own lunchtime entertainments. If you have been wondering what was a woman doing going to locksmith school then I should probably tell you that Yvonne was the ONLY woman in a class of thirty five men. All of them were vying for her attention too. Her mother had a son who had been a pimp and gave all of his money to their mother, Ms. Beatty. Ms. Beatty in turn, invested all the money that they son gave her into real estate. At the time Yvonne and I were in locksmith school, her mother must have owned about thirty or more properties, some of them houses and some of them multi-unit apartment complexes. I really don’t know how many properties they actually owned but it was enough to where Yvonne could house me in one and Noah in another. Didn’t seem to effect her bottom line at all. Ms. Beatty had trained Yvonne to take over all the real estate after she passed on and that was the reason that she was learning locksmithing, she maintained all of her mother’s properties. Getting back to lunch time excursions, eventually Noah didn’t want to come along anymore. I now understand that it was about this time that Noah had moved in with a doctor who lived in the Berkeley Hills. I think this was the real reason that she “rejected” him.
Noah refused Yvonne’s offer to go to lunch one day and she went by herself. I stayed in class and ate from the liquor store across the street (a frozen burrito I think). This happened again the next day except this time after asking Noah to lunch and being refused, Yvonne turned to me and asked me if I wanted to go. Surprised, I halfheartedly said okay and we both sullenly left together. Neither one of us really knew each other that well and I dreaded making the effort to converse. Noah had been the “life of the party” and without him I felt the trip would be sheer drudgery. Much to my surprise though, Yvonne was very patient and began to tell me about herself. She told me that her mother had a terminal disease and was dying, that her marriage was on the rocks and that her brother had an advanced case of AIDS. At this point, I was ready to jump out of the Jeep and walk back to school. How do you just lay all of that on somebody you don’t know? I now know that it was because she was kind of crazy, a sex addict, drank booze and did crank but kept it all well hidden. She later told me that she had chosen me because I was the best looking guy in class and that even though my personality wasn’t all that, she had no intention of talking very much. She also figured that since I was divorced we had something in common. Yeah, right. She was just getting back at Noah and had no real intentions towards me at all, I was about as interesting as a bologna sandwich on white bread. That however, would drastically change very soon.
After our second lunch non-date Yvonne decided that she didn’t like me and started giving me the cold shoulder. That was fine by me, I could now re-focus on my studies and not have to deal with this woman and all of her problems. That lasted for about a week. All of the other guys were trying to get at her but I totally ignored her. Every once in a while though, I would look up from studying and catch her staring at me all goofy like. I would be puzzled because I was dumb, which was just as well as it came across as disinterest. Then one day she started talking to me again out of the blue. Always the nice guy, I was just as friendly as I had always been. This time however, she asked me if I would like to go somewhere after school to get something to eat. She made up some barely plausible reason for this but seemed sincere enough. For some crazy reason that I still don’t understand, I agreed. I think that It was a combination of things that made me throw caution to the wind like that. First, I was lonely so soon after my divorce and was feeling less than desirable. She was appealing to my damaged ego. Second, I was still angry at my ex for causing me such pain and lastly, I was horny. After having it regular for so long and then to all of a sudden go to zero, anything willing looks good and Yvonne definitely seemed willing. As soon as she asked me to go out and it was obviously a thinly veiled invitation for sex, I instantly felt a stirring in my loins that somehow overpowered my brain. Before I could think clearly I had already given her a naughty grin and said yes. It was some kind of primal wave length that we both were on at that exact moment, we both knew that we would be f*cking that night.
She asked me as class ended, I guess so that in case I refused she could immediately run away and avoid the embarrassment of rejection. I was supposed to go straight home to ma as always but there would be no chance for that. I couldn’t even call because this was before cell phones were ubiquitous. It was wild abandon and I was going off the rails, doing things totally out of character and feeling like I was owed a little period of bad behavior. I felt entitled. Because Yvonne had told me that her marriage was functionally over (which may have been true), I didn’t give any thought to the fact that she was still married and living in the same house with both her husband and her daughters. SHE WAS MARRIED AND I COULDN’T SEE IT. How stupid I was.
We get into her Jeep and there was this weird easiness that hadn’t been there before. Gone was the shy guy and in his place was this leering lech that kept looking at her hips and imagining what it was going to feel like being between them. Yvonne was all smiles and seemed excited and pliant although she was making all of the decisions. We skipped getting something to eat and headed straight for Walgreens to buy condoms. I am ashamed to admit it but, I had never used condoms before. All of the relationships I had been in were monogamous as far as I knew, and most of the women were on birth control or fixed. There simply was no need. So when we get into that isle, I had no idea what to buy. Yvonne seemed clueless as well and so I went with what I had heard was good which was sheepskin, REAL SHEEPSKIN. Well, for all that we paid for them they didn’t get much use. Almost as fast as we put it on it was taken back off again and then, need I say more? We had chosen a little motel about five block away from my mom’s in Berkeley call “The Bel Air Motel”. It is no longer there either. I didn’t get back home until morning the next day. We spent the night together. Since it had been Friday there was no class and even though I wanted her to stay and she did too, she had to go back home and face the music with her husband and kids. By this time of course, I wasn’t thinking about all that, I wasn’t used to having to think like that anyway. It was all new to me and seemed strange. In my mind, if we spend the night together then we are together now and should spend almost every minute we can with each other. This having to go away somewhere after having shared such a fun and intimate moment was really traumatic and weird to me. I didn’t like it at all, not one bit. I believe I actually got cross with her but that only cemented the bond. If I had held any reservations before this they were long gone now. She belonged to me now and that was that. I didn’t see her again until next school day on Monday.
I usually got to school early and so I was able to see her as she came in. Her attitude was very “kittenish”, like a cat who had just eaten a bird. She played with me but told me that we should keep it low key (on the down low as they say now) but I would have none of that. I think this irritated her. At the end of the day she left kind of in a huff, as if I had done something wrong. I took this to mean that she was back to disliking me again and so, I did my best to emotionally disengage. I went back to ignoring her and refused to talk to her, she acted cross with me. This went on for about a week and it was sheer agony for me. I had knots in my stomach the entire time but I was determined to not let another woman ruin my plans again. I was going to get through this training no matter what happened, even if I had to puke my guts out everyday. The week passed and the gentle mercies of the weekend soothed. By Monday, I was totally over Yvonne and I think she picked up on this, of course that made her curious once more.
She started talking to me again but in an irritated way. I responded without showing any emotion whatsoever, just as if we had met for the very first time. This was not an act either, I had totally put her out of my mind, I no longer cared one way or the other. As the second week progressed my indifference really seemed to bother her, she started doing things to try and provoke me, trying to make me mad. She would do rude things like step on my toes, snatch things as I gave them to her, make nasty comments behind my back with other students and finally talk about me in full earshot. Although I was in torment and the other student ravenously participated in my ridicule, I ignored it all and continued to make high marks on all of my tests. After one more week of this, two weeks total, I guess she couldn’t take it anymore and decided to confront me. She caught me at lunch time just as I was getting ready to leave and proceeded to bitterly blame me for all that had transpired. It was all my fault from beginning to end and I was just the most terrible person on earth. Confused, I weakly tried to defend myself but she would have none of it. Then, as quickly as she had snuck up on me, she was gone. Another weekend alone. I could just not understand why she hated me so much. Stupid right?
Then, a strange thing happened. Monday came as usual and her hostile attitude was the same as usual, but then she started talking to me in a nicer tone. It was strange though, every time she asked me a question and I was about to respond she would cut me off and not allow me to finish. It was like she wasn’t listening. after about five minutes of this she rather forcefully said that we should go somewhere to discuss why it was that I had been such a butt head but that I shouldn’t expect anything else but conversation. I haplessly agreed and at the end of that class we got in her Jeep and went somewhere. We talked about her situation again, she asked me about mine and true to her words, all we did was talk. Again she told me that there could be nothing between us and that we should just remain friends. She dropped me off at my mom’s place and drove away never looking back. The next week in class was not hostile, this time she was the one who was indifferent.
Finally, she suggested that we go somewhere again because she was feeling too much pressure from all that was happening in her life and that going out with me would be a nice distraction. I agreed and we left after class. Somewhere during the evening she said that her husband had traveled back to Arkansas where he was from and that the kids had gone with him too. She was free for the evening and would it be ok if we spent the night together. Of course I said yes but she seemed less than enthusiastic. Almost like she had nothing better to do. Well, the time came for us to lay down for the night and she suggested that we go to her house since nobody else was there. Now I understand how bad this really was but back then, I was as dumb as a bag of hammers. After cleaning up a bit, giving me a tour and asking me if I wanted something to eat or drink, she took me by the hand and lead me straight to the master bedroom. She showed me the bathroom and shower, then pointed to the bed. She then started getting undressed and was soon completely naked. I was so nervous I just stood there as she pulled back the covers and got into the bed. Still standing there she said to me “well, are you coming?” It was like a tornado instantly ripped my clothes off. I got into bed, did a little petting and then, angry sex. By the time morning had come we weren’t mad at each other anymore.
It gets a little hazy here, from then on the days were a blur. I can tell you this much though, after that weekend at her house, the sex got mind blowing good. So good in fact that people started to notice. Both of us began to lose weight and both of us had that unmistakable glow. We fell deeply, hopelessly in love. It was so obvious that everyone she knew became concerned that she was being too reckless, throwing everything away just to be with me. They thought that I was with her for her eventual inheritance but that couldn’t have been further from the truth. I just wanted her, that was all. I don’t think like that.
Like I said before, the rest of the tale is a blur. I don’t mean that I can’t remember, it is just so much that I don’t know where to start. We traveled all around the state and stayed at various hotels, para-sailed at Catalina Island, went to Las Vegas four times, took three cruises, stayed at and got banned from the Clairmont Hotel for having sex in the elevator, traveled down to San Diego to visit my father and sister, rented too many cars to mention and so much more. We even saw the Oakland hills on fire while coming back from a Reno trip on the bus. When we went to go visit my mother you could feel the heat all the way down to where she was, more than two miles away. It was like being next to an open oven.
I had an outstanding warrant for driving on a suspended license and had to go to work furlough for about three months during this time. Everyday that I was supposed to be going out to look for work, Yvonne would come pick me up and we would bang each other’s brains out. Everyday except for weekends. She would drive by the facility and hold up signs in the window of the Jeep that read “I Love You Eldon” and “You Are My Husband”. My fellow inmates would tease me to no end.
Many women on her family’s side were extremely jealous and were constantly trying to break us up. They would try to scare her and tell her that I was only out for her money, or shame her by saying that our relationship was based purely on sex. Yvonne would get very angry when they did this to her, she considered it insulting as if she was too dumb to take care of herself. They were so bold that they would tell her these things right in front of me, causing her to come sit in my lap and wrap her arms around my neck defiantly. Not only that, but they would often pull me off alone and try to convince me to leave her for the sake of her family life, like I was some kind of home-wrecker. Actually, I did end up breaking up her marriage however unintentionally. I was extremely stupid back then. Yvonne had always told both me and my mom that her and her husband had an open marriage and that as long as certain curfews and other rules were adhered to, each could do what they wanted. She even bragged that she had brought other men home to meet her spouse and that they shook hands and were very cordial. Noah had met him and so she had no inkling that there would be a problem with me. Well, I did meet her husband and soon after that is when the trouble began. It would seem that there was something different about me than with her other lovers. Something different indeed.
I can’t tell you how many times the man tried to beat me up. I’m not saying he was wrong at all, its just that, if he was so okay with all of her other men, why was he so upset about me? I would say the man tried to assault me about six times in that year and a half. It was always a shock too, to both of us. Personally, I can’t blame him, I wouldn’t want to have to see anyone with my ex either. Nobody likes that. I just could not understand why he wanted to get to violent with me after all of the others. Oh, well, I’ll never do anything like that again, ever. If I find out that a woman is married or even in a serious living situation, I won’t have anything to do with her. This is true even if both her and the man assure me that it is OK. Uh uh, no way Jose. Not me, not ever again.
Interestingly enough, Yvonne reveled in tormenting my ex wife Beverly. My mom lived not but ten blocks away from her so every time that Yvonne came to get me, she would swing by Beverly’s and cause a scene. I was always so horrified and really felt sorry for Beverly. It was just pitiful, just pitiful. Beverly had Narcolepsy you see, and suffered paralyzing attacks of cataplexy when upset. Yvonne would pull up to the front door, honk the horn and wait for Beverly to come to the door. When Beverly opened the door Yvonne would start berating her with “Yeah, I got yo man bitch, uh huh, and he’s goood too, bitch!” Poor Beverly, she would get so upset she would almost collapse where she stood. It was all she could do just to hold herself up. I felt so bad for her but what could I do? Yvonne was taking care of me in every way, I was practically living with her. Call me a coward but I dare not offend her by showing any sympathy for my ex-wife. I hated it but I was too afraid that Yvonne would get mad and turn on me. I would just try to stop her and get the hell out of there as soon as possible. My mom thought it was terrible too. It seems so strange now that both of those women are dead.
I went through the death of Yvonne’s mother with her and sat with the family at the funeral. Everybody had warned me not to do that as they considered it to be a disgrace but now that I think about it, they just didn’t want me making any inheritance claims. Yvonne insisted that I sit right by her side during the funeral so I had no choice but to comply. Her word was the last word as far as I was concerned. Her brother Larry who was dying of AIDS was very upset with her for making me do that, I think his ear had been bent by the others. After her mother died, something changed between us. It was very subtle but there. I think that was the beginning of the end.
Finally, the relationship soured as most mis-matched ones do. By this time I had seen all of Yvonne’s dirty little secrets like the drinking and the drugging. As if that wasn’t bad enough, she was also a sex addict and we were constantly running into guys that she had been with. I had begun to wake up to the woman that I was actually with, and had started thinking with the big head instead of the little one. She began cheating on me too so that was definitely a deal killer. I wanted out and had asked my mom if I could move back in with her. She welcomed me back with open arms. When I finally broke it off, Yvonne came to our front door and collapsed in a heap, crying uncontrollably. Mom wanted to go to the door but I stopped her, I don’t like being cheated on and to me it is unforgivable. More crazy stuff transpired after that, which I am too embarrassed to detail here, but suffice it to say were both lucky to walk away in one piece. I later heard from others that Yvonne wen totally bonkers after we broke up. She was the one who was supposed to take care of the properties but her sister Doll had to step in and save them. Tenants were in the dark because she wouldn’t pay the PG&E bill, the water would get turned off etc. Apparently, she just shut down for a while. I didn’t hear about much as time passed.
Yeah, I would say that during that year and a half with Yvonne, I lived a lifetimes worth of experiences. I did things with her that I would never have done even now. As bad as it all went there towards the end, I must say that I will be eternally grateful to Yvonne for expanding my horizons the way that she did. I know that it was a serious sin and very immoral to be with her while she was still married (we got her wedding band cut off together) and that she might have patched things up with her husband had I not come along, but I wouldn’t trade those memories for anything. Really, I can’t imagine how shallow I might now be if our paths had never crossed. Despite all of her problems she was very smart and wise about many things and I learned a great deal about life from her. She died in Vallejo California in 2009 at the age of 56, from what causes I do not know. Eighteen years after I last saw her. I used to think that 56 was very young to die but since this Gangstalker poisoning of mine, she may actually have lived longer than I will at 46. I find it fateful that Yvonne died exactly one year, one month and one day from the time that my ex-wife Beverly died in 2008. If you believe in the significance of numbers, 111 seems to denote new beginnings. I don’t believe in numerology but it is odd just the same.
Goodbye Beverly and goodbye Yvonne. Each of you added to my life in your own way and I take no pleasure in your passings. Hopefully those of us survivors will go on to thrive and eventually all meet back up again in heaven. In spite of all the bad times, I will remember you fondly.